Bear image dis-order

Pic from http://malepatternboldness.blogspot.com.au

Recently a Facebook friend posted a picture of his new physique in the lead up to his first bodybuilding competition. What followed was 100+ comments regarding the picture. Comments were overwhelmingly supportive of the effort gone into obtaining his new physique. Among the comments were some thoughts from bear friends encouraging his hard work, but also stating also their preference for his 'old' look. It got me thinking about 'bear image' in a new light.

I've been musing about the extent to which we hold other bears accountable for keeping up their 'bear image'. I have experienced this to a lesser extent in the few times that I have shaved my beard off completely. I can vividly remember bears coming up to me in the pub with a startled and shocked look upon their face. "What have you done?" was the general tone. Like my Facebook friend, I was also generously offered the feedback that they preferred my more hirsute image.

Does bear community turn its back upon those among us who lose weight, shave their beard, gain muscle, wax their chest, etc? I wonder if unconsciously we malign those who pursue or experiment with modifying their body in some such way. It gets me wondering if bear community could be only follicle-deep behind our ideals of inclusivity, masculinity and non-attitude.

It could easily be said that this is just one bear expressing their opinion or preference about another, like commenting on someone's fashion. However, I do wonder what would happen if a bear turned up at the pub one week with only one leg? Would bears come up and say, "I preferred you with two legs". Clearly they wouldn't, as that would be crossing the invisible line of taste.

So whats the difference between someone losing weight and losing a leg? Perhaps it comes down to the intent to change oneself in a major way. Maybe it shines a light upon our intolerance for people who intentionally move away from our stereotyped ideals of bearhood. Are we really that superficial? Cheeseburgers for thought.

Mardi Gras vs Mardi Grinch

Image from http://republicjewelry.com

Tonight marks the beginning of the Mardi Gras for many bears travelling to Sydney for Mardi Gras. The Underbear party, as the name suggests, is when bears from all around Australia and visiting countries get down to their undies and do what bears do best....party. However, not everyone shares this Mardi Gras spirit, with many people ambivalent at best, or those anti-Mardi Gras.

I can vividly remember holding grinch-like views about Mardi Gras. I felt that the parade was purely another commercial exploitation of gay culture. I felt the television broadcast served to perpetuate the ignorance in straight community about the diversity of gay and lesbian culture, and the body types we inhabit. My television-only perspective of Mardi Gras had left me with belief that it was not something I wished to participate in. I held this view without ever having experienced Mardi Gras first hand.

Having been to Mardi Gras twice now, I can only say that that my attitude has changed dramatically. My experiences of Mardi Gras have been warm, inclusive and a celebration of diversity. The bear events, such the Underbear party have to be experienced to be understood. You only have to look around the room to see every size, shape and age enjoying the same space in the celebration of what it means to be a bear, and go a little crazy at the same time.

My experience of marching in the parade was something I will never forget. After hours of waiting in the marshaling area, it was finally our turn to head up Oxford St. As soon as the crowds recognised the presence of the bears, they erupted in applause and excitement. I had never experienced such an overwhelming feeling of pride and achievement within myself. I had overcome a lot in my life just to be there, marching among my fellow bears staking our claim among gay community.

Looking back now, it was my fear and prejudice about Mardi Gras which had clouded my judgement. I had judged it based upon what I saw on television,  and had projected my own insecurity about not feeling worthy of being a part of it. I was wrong, I was always worthy, my predudice had just clouded my vision. Wishing all the bears a safe and sexy time. Happy Mardi Gras!